I know I promised a rant-blog, but I don't really care about that anymore. I've actually been writing quite a bit lately, but its all just words and images that have been bubbling and boiling in my head for a long time and finally have the room to spill out on the page. This is the most recent.
The room was very dark
The boy was fast asleep
He can’t be dreaming, he gave it up
It doesn’t interest him anymore
Still as a log
Floating on a sedated river
Unknowingly dreading the sunshine moments
“Hello”
said a voice
right above his young, stoic face
“I’ve come back for you”
The boy’s eyes flew open
A flock of frightened birds
Taking off into the sky
Without maps or compasses
Which they leave below
Air fell like water into his lungs
Crashing into the rocks,
the Wreckage of his heart.
The muscles of his throat
Dancers in the wings
Sprang into action, warming at an instant
Ready to scream
But out came a tumbling laugh
A twinkling giggle of relief
For the bright yellow eyes that glowed above him
Were the most familiar thing in the room,
Everything else formed into a sad blur
And he waved them away with a tired hand
Every time his dusty eyes summoned the energy
To perceive them.
Joyful, intoxicated fairies
Black out drunk from weeks of forgetting
Rolled out of their beds
And tumbled down his cheeks
Singing and laughing
Meeting in their secret hiding place
At the corners of his lips
(A place I’ve been to once
And have been dreaming about ever since)
“I remember you”
said the boy
“You made me cry as a child
When you visited me in my dreams
I could never forget those eyes
I thought I would never grow up
And you would haunt me forever”
The eyes above him chuckled
Blowing out a thick mist
Of cigarette fog
With a practiced motion
The dull yellow light
Lit up the boy’s face
In a peculiar way
Tangles of wrinkles
Rivers of sadness
Death and decay
Flowed through his beautiful skin
And his eyes looked like lost moons
Floating through an empty galaxy
Looking for a planet to adore
“I’m a hostage”
said the boy
to the Monster
“Of a Dirty Queen
She keeps me in this rat-infested cage
With endless mazes made of concrete
I get lost every night
Until I see the blinking neon lights
Above my room
Where I hide from the thieves
And prostitutes
And drink myself to a lonely sleep.
My only relief is the arms of a gentle woman
Her cage is small and steamy
But it provides some warmth
When the nights are cold.
Once in a while the Queen reveals herself
She slinks out of the shadows,
A homeless man
A bag of trash
She could be the sounds in the sewers
Whispering watery secrets,
She is beautiful, she reeks
She is nothing but filth and lies
But I would give up my soul
To touch her
And when she opens the door
She says I can go whenever I please
But I can’t see what lies beyond
And I’ve forgotten the way home”
The Monster sat back in his chair
And blew out a thoughtful fog
A chimney for the fires of chaos
Just below the surface
The yellow eyes smiled at the boy
They remembered the nights
When they paraded along the streets
Of the boy’s mind as he slept
Setting small fires that now
Were healthy and raging
Turning the withered, dried forests
Of his dreams
Once so lush and green
Into smoldering dust.
He looked at his child
With tear stains on his face
A love so near to hate
That it almost burst through his skin
“My dear child”
his voice came out like gravel and metal
“I am your only friend
In this stinking, icy cage
Only I have seen your face
Without wrinkle or the telling signs
Of stolen innocence
Stick with me
And I’ll show you the way out
Someday
Keep me well-fed
And never let me grow cold
And I will never leave you
Together we’ll find our Home”
He threw back the blankets
And crawled into the bed next to his favorite
Child
The boy cried out
The feet of his only friend
Were cold as eyes
But he let the Monster encircle him
With strong, tree-trunk arms
He slept as he wept
Not dreaming of the green things
Only of fire
And concrete
*A note to this boy
Songs from across the sea call to me now
While you were chasing the phantoms
And throwing yourself upon any dream
That floated by
You grew blind to my eyes
And deaf to my touch
Now as I rock and sway in the bowels of this ship
Without even a window to know the time of day
Or a compass to know my direction
I feel your salty tears
Rise up from below the creaking floor
From the sympathetic ocean
Our sadness is the same
Under your bed
That the Monster has claimed
That the Queen has provided
That your woman enjoys
Is a bright, shining sword
And a suit of armor
Given to you by the King
Of your forgotten life
For wrestling the demons
That plagued the forest
And kept the children inside
While the flowers danced alone
In the sun
And the trees called their names
Driving them mad
A hero from the old times
The knight of your old songs
A treasure of a nation
Ripe with apple trees
And singing maids
Build up your strength
Find your courage
Look under your bed
And take up the arms
Wage the wars, or they will be waged
Against you
Break down the prison gates
And murder the Queen
The one that you love
And follow me into the Sea
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